While Being in Love

You’ve probably heard the story about the couple who struggled to get pregnant and with broken hearts, made a plan for adoption. However, just before things could work out—a miracle happened. They got pregnant! The happy couple no longer needed to pursue adoption, because their dreams came true. They would have a baby of their own. It was miraculous and wonderful. A great story. Record scratch. Freeze frame. This is not a story about us.  I’ve heard about this kind of experience several times since I opened up about infertility and adoption. (“I’ll be honest, I’ve heard it probably 50 times. You can quote me on that,” says Jk.) It has been shared as both a personal experience and a secondhand story. No matter who is sharing, of course it’s amazing. God has the ability to intervene when the time is right and some couples are meant to get pregnant instead of adopt. What a blessing! However... I am cautious whenever I hear this story (or stories like it) for a number of reasons. 1...

How can I even convey the excitement in my heart?! Monday morning, Jk and I attended our first ever appointment with an adoption attorney! I wrote down a few thoughts following the appointment, knowing they would be scattered, but wanting to record every detail so nothing would slip out of my memory. A friend referred us to the law firm, saying she occasionally gets emails about potential birth families. Our interest continued to grow when we learned that this firm will hold a copy of our adoption profile book in their office to show birth mothers! — My thoughts immediately after our appointment were: I’m imagining a birth mother holding a stack of binders and books, containing information about couples who want to adopt her baby; somewhere in that pile, there is a spiral-bound profile for my husband and I, with our faces smiling on the front cover. I want to know these women--all of these birth mothers who boldly consider their futures and the future of the babies inside of t...